Feature Presentation: 2015-16 BDL All-Defensive* Team
We at Ball Don’t Lie enjoy healthy debate about basketball and its strange cast of characters, from Oscar Robertson’s “get off my lawn” diatribe on Stephen Curry to D’Angelo Russell’s sting operation on a self-dubbed dude named Swaggy P and his Australian hip hop artist fiancé. (Yup, those things happened.) It’s NBA with a twist here at the BDL, so we wanted to stir the pot and shake up the league’s annual awards.
BDL ALL-DEFENSIVE* TEAM
*As in: “adjective | behaving in a way that shows that you feel people are criticizing you.”
And not: “adjective | of or relating to the attempt to keep an opponent from scoring in a game.”
Think antagonistic opponents, chronic complainers, referee aggressors and media adversaries.
In other words, just think about the Los Angeles Clippers.
AND THE WINNERS ARE …
FIRST TEAM
LeBron James, Cleveland Cavaliers (unanimous): Well, considering he may or may not have orchestrated the firing of one head coach, only to earn a scolding from his new coach about his “occasionally peculiar behavior” — unfollowing his team on social media and publicly expressing his desire to team up with fellow defensive* nominees Carmelo Anthony and Chris Paul — I’d say he qualifies. Yup, he sure does:
Kevin Durant, Oklahoma City Thunder (unanimous): “Man, the [media and experts are] always trying to nitpick us. I mean, they don’t like us. They don’t like how Russell [Westbrook] talks to the media, they don’t like how I talk to the media. So obviously, yeah, they’re not going to give us the benefit of the doubt.”
Dwight Howard, Houston Rockets: Even his “I ain’t tripping” defense after stickum-gate is a defense mechanism, and the endless innuendo referencing his teammates is transparent enough. And then …
DeMarcus Cousins, Sacramento Kings: Anybody who’s suspended for elbowing Al Horford, conduct detrimental to his team and amassing not just 16, but a 17th technical foul is an a shoe-in for this “honor.”
Austin Rivers, Los Angeles Clippers: On top of tossing a seat cushion into the stands on opening night, knocking out a woman’s contact lens, the top-10 pick turned career backup on dad’s team offered this gem after watching many of the game’s best compete in at Team USA scrimmage over the summer:
SECOND TEAM
Derrick Rose, Chicago Bulls
Matt Barnes, Memphis Grizzlies
Carmelo Anthony, New York Knicks
Markieff Morris, Phoenix Suns/Washington Wizards
Draymond Green, Golden State Warriors
AND THE NOMINEES WERE …
| 2015-16 BDL ALL-DEFENSIVE* TEAM RESULTS | ||||
| PLAYER | TEAM | 1ST (2 PTS) | 2ND (1 PT) | Total |
| First Team | ||||
| Kevin Durant | Oklahoma City | 4 | — | 8 |
| LeBron James | Cleveland | 4 | — | 8 |
| Dwight Howard | Orlando | 3 | — | 6 |
| DeMarcus Cousins | Sacramento | 2 | 1 | 5 |
| Austin Rivers | L.A. Clippers | 2 | — | 4 |
| Second Team | ||||
| Carmelo Anthony | New York | 1 | 1 | 3 |
| Matt Barnes | Memphis | 1 | 1 | 3 |
| Markieff Morris | Phoenix/Washington | 1 | 1 | 3 |
| Derrick Rose | Chicago | 1 | 1 | 3 |
| Draymond Green | Golden State | — | 3 | 3 |
| Others Receiving Votes | ||||
| Blake Griffin | L.A. Clippers | 1 | — | 2 |
| James Harden | Houston | — | 2 | 2 |
| Kyrie Irving | Cleveland | — | 2 | 2 |
| J.R. Smith | Cleveland | — | 2 | 2 |
| Russell Westbrook | Oklahoma City | — | 2 | 2 |
| Jimmy Butler | Chicago | — | 1 | 1 |
| Damian Lillard | Portland | — | 1 | 1 |
| Joakim Noah | Chicago | — | 1 | 1 |
| Rajon Rondo | Sacramento | — | 1 | 1 |
AND NOW A WORD FROM THE ACADEMY …
We understand some of the fun comes with picking apart the voting panel and publicly shaming their misfires, so we’ll do our best to explain ourselves before you folks let us have it in the comment section.
Actually, you know what? Screw it. These teams are totally subjective, so if you’ve got a problem with them, maybe your therapist or cat or imaginary friend will be willing to hear you out about how Kevin Durant isn’t defensive; he’s just doesn’t like you guys in the media?!?! Maybe we get the defensive vibe from him a little more than you do. Relax. It’s cool. We enjoy watching all these guys, if only because their idiosyncrasies provide great fodder for blog posts, but these are the dissidents we’re rolling with.
CUE THE AUDIENCE REACTION …
2015-16 BDL AWARDS
IN THEATERS NOW: Bench of the Year • Coach(ing Change) of the Year • Defensive Unit of the Year • (Non-Lottery) Rookie of the Year • Executive (Decision) of the Year • (2nd) Most Valuable Player • Most (Random) Improved Player • Comeback Player of the Year • All-Potential Team • All-Defensive* Team
COMING SOON: All-BDL Team
WE REALLY, REALLY LIKE YOU
First and foremost, we’d like to thank Yahoo Sports Photos and Multimedia Manager Amber Matsumoto for her tireless work on graphics. None of this would’ve been possible without her. And special thanks to Basketball Reference and NBA.com/stats for statistics, Mike Goldfarb for the Vine, Streamable for the gif and Austin Rivers for his Twitter, which might only be the second-most defensive* account in the family.
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Ben Rohrbach is a contributor for Ball Don’t Lie and Shutdown Corner on Yahoo Sports. Have a tip? Email him at [email protected] or follow him on Twitter! Follow @brohrbach
