5 reasons Bengals backup AJ McCarron is way better than Tom Brady

Following his 280-yard, two-touchdown performance filling in for the injured Andy Dalton in a loss to the Steelers, AJ McCarron said what every Bengals fan should want to hear from their backup quarterback.

“You’ve got to embrace it,” McCarron told reporters. “I love it. You gotta love pressured moments. That’s what makes you great. It’s when the great ones really shine. I guess Tom Brady was in the same situation when he had the opportunity, so I gotta make the most of it, do my job each week, know we have an unbelievable defense, don’t turn the ball over and we have a chance to win. I promised the guys I’ll work my tail off and be ready to go.”

Any time your starting QB goes down, you should pray the backup becomes Brady, who led the New England Patriots to the first of four Super Bowl titles after replacing an ailing Drew Bledsoe in his debut.

And here are five reasons McCarron is actually way better than the greatest QB in the history of football:

5. McCarron was the starter for Alabama’s back-to-back BCS National Championships in 2012 and 2013. Brady only served as a backup to Brian Griese when Michigan captured the national title in 1997.

4. McCarron was drafted a whole 35 spots ahead of Brady.

3. Brady finished just 5-for-10 in a 10-3 loss to the rival New York Jets when Mo Lewis knocked Bledsoe out of commission in 2001. At least McCarron completed 21-of-32 attempts and threw for a pair of TDs after Dalton broke his thumb tackling Stephen Tuitt on an interception return in the loss to the Steelers.

2. McCarron has a tattoo of Jesus on his chest. Brady does not have a tattoo of Jesus on his chest.

1. McCarron’s wife, Katherine Webb, once posed for Sports Illustrated’s Swimsuit Issue. Brady’s wife, Gisele Bundchen, only ever appeared in the Swimsuit Issue in a “Got Milk?” ad. Webb capitalized on her fame with an invitation to ABC’s “Celebrity Diving” reality show. What ever became of Bundchen?

In all honesty, an NFL scout once compared McCarron to Brady, via the NFL Network’s Albert Breer:

“Good size, outstanding touch on all throws, can make all the throws but only has average arm strength. Average running ability but very good feet and movement in the pocket to avoid sacks. Outstanding progression-read quarterback, makes throws to his second and third reads consistently. Doesn’t turn the ball over. Winner. Mentally tough. Has the moxie and cockiness most great QBs have. Very similar to Tom Brady in stature, athletic ability, arm strength, touch and the most important category — wins.”

For Cincinnati’s sake, the Bengals should only hope this 2013 assessment turns out to be accurate.